Perils of Performance

Right now my current project is in a very rough stage. I have so many holes to fill, emotion to tie in, and adventure yet to be written! The third story in my trilogy is perhaps the most challenging. I have come up with the plot and where I want to end up and I have added so much and am enriching the story but alas problems arise! Perhaps this is due to my lack of time at the moment or perhaps a lack of focus but I think I actually intimidated myself.

By intimidating myself I mean I am pressuring my brain to create the most epic, pulse-pounding, heartfelt book yet. So my hype is actually freaking me out. I want it to be so good that I find myself scrutinizing every chapter, sentence, and word. I look to my other two stories for confidence and wish I could recapture the magic or at least think I recaptured the magic to finish the first draft.

Alas the way I have written this story is vastly different from the others because the others I finished during long binges that never lasted more than seventeen hours. This time I could not binge write as much. I think the disjointed writing is throwing me off. I will return to the binge soon. I must.

I also know way more about writing this time around which in a way is good but also bad because I find myself being more cautious not to screw up when I shouldn't be. I can fix it very easily. I rarely find myself mulling over how to fix something so perhaps now because I have not plowed through it like a juggernaut my brain actively picks on my writing. I worry more now than before.

Lastly, writing a series of books that all connect causes pressure because you want to feel like you topped yourself and made it the best sequel you can otherwise what is the point?

Javelina Evolution

We talk about craft and strategy so much, but we can’t write without feelings.

I have just gone through a year of Editorial Aversion. Except for my critique group, I have not shown anything to anybody. And in the meantime, something happened in publishing. The mounds of rejections slips are now replaced at many publishers by: silence. The usual phrasing is “NEW POLICY: “If you don’t hear from us in 4 weeks (6 months, a year), you can assume your manuscript does not meet our present needs.” So I was even less motivated to put myself out for ignoring than I was for rejecting!

But all that changed in 2010. Determination was renewed and I just sent a story to an editor, a proposal to an agent, and signed up for a serious online analysis with a well known NY editor. (It was very cool to see his name in my inbox!) And signed up for two conferences to be critiqued. This is my year!

The project most under the microscope for me at the moment is my Southwestern tale about a javelina. The editor’s first round response was: “the setting is great. Your assignment is to find a different story.” Yikes! But it was constructive feedback and he is looking at it again. I did “find the new story” in the time allotted. I salvaged the setting and the name of the javalina…

But he is not the fluffy little javelina I imagined in the beginning. (OK –they are not fluffy or cuddly and no one wants a stuffed one.) I know ultimately publishing is a joint venture between author, editor and illustrator and if everyone is willing to compromise, the end project is the best it can be. The new story is probably better, but I am feeling some distance from it now. After all, the little fella might have to morph again to “meet someone’s present needs.” Maybe he’ll have to sprout wings. Turn purple. Become a bunny.

Feelings? Self-protective. Determined. A little loss and lots of hope.

Hey - my story of the lemming is perfect as it is!

The Production of a First Draft

-Have idea.

- Scratch notes on anything I find.

-Write scenes.

-Keep writing scenes.

- Stitch scenes together.

- Okay, I can use that.

-Can't use that.

I can't believe I wrote ten pages that I can't use. Don't use double negative when talking to oneself.

-Need to revise.

-Still revising.

- Still revising.

Why am I still revising it's only thirteen pages. Robin and Monta would be so proud.

-Leave it alone.

-I said leave it alone.

-Turn it in.

Ask group for forgivenes that it is late again. Deadlines are such motivators.

When in doubt, cut it out...

I like to mull over scenes, dialogue, whole chapters before I sit down at the computer--not on paper, just in my head. I find that my mind is the clearest and I tend to be the most creative right before I fall asleep at night. And, I can't believe I am admitting this, but if I am having writer's block sometimes I lie down like I am going to take a nap. I have no idea why this works for me, but it does...as long as I don't actually fall asleep for real.

That said, here is my pattern for starting a new chapter and submitting to my critique group:

1. Try my best to write at least a half an hour to forty-five minutes each night. Also check Facebook, write emails, pay bills, read the news that pops up on Yahoo's home page, look at photos of celebrities I could care less about. End up staying on the computer for way longer than the half an hour to forty minutes because of this. Occasionally get on a roll. Still do the other stuff. Stay up too late.

2. Futz around with the first half of the chapter for most of the month. Cobwebs clear as our critique meeting approaches. Realize that the reason I keep rewriting certain passages is because they are not working or are irrelevant. Cut them out. Breathe a sigh of relief that they are gone and are no longer vexing me. Finally, get to the second half of the chapter, which for whatever reason, usually goes more quickly.

3. Print chapter out. Read, mark up, change. Print out. Read, mark up change. Print, read, mark up....well you get the picture. This usually occurs until I have reached my self-imposed deadline for emailing the manuscript to my fellow group members.

4. Wonder about how it will be received, particularly the humor and the dialogue. (Starting also to think about scene setting and whether I've included enough of it.)

5. Resist temptation to work more on my first chapter. Just kidding....um, mostly.

writing process (with or without caffeine)

I really like both Jim’s and Robin’s posts. I think I’ve mentioned in previous posts that the idea phase for me could be something funny my son said, something I heard in a song, a news story I read online, a whole scene that comes to me while walking the dog late at night. Most of the time I keep repeating it to myself over and over till I can dash to my computer and furiously type the idea. If it’s a scene of dialogue or paragraphs of backstory, I do allow myself to just type it all out without worrying about revising along the way, like Jim’s method. If I am going on a road trip of a few hours or more, I do keep a small notebook and pen with me in the passenger seat instead of dragging my laptop up there. And of course “you have a deadline for class, think of something quick!” can force ideas.

I would either write late at night when the house is quiet or follow the way of Robin to the local cafe (but if you’ve read my previous posts, you know that I may be distracted by conversations around me, which just spur more ideas!). Like Robin, I usually have several windows open--the document on which I am working, probably an online dictionary, possibly a rhyming dictionary, and some kind of research for whatever I am working on--the kitchen band picture book? I found lists of various instruments online. The Ghoulsbys? I had a list of “spooky” names I found online. While writing kitchen band, I also had my itunes open to listen to three or four songs that were about playing in the kitchen and made lots of sounds for me to try to find words to convey. I might have a window open so I can look on Amazon and see if there are similar books that have been written recently.

Even for picture books, I usually do some kind of outline first--if following the rule of three, what three obstacles or events is my main character going to face? Any funny phrases or words that I will be working in? With whom will my MC be interacting? What sentences or lines of verse will be repeated? What will be the ultimate resolution of the story? Even if I have those things sketched out, I very well might swerve into something else as I am writing.

Then there is the call to check email, of course. Then I edit and revise and move stuff around. Usually after I go home or wake up the next day, I open it up and find more things to tinker with. At some point, I have to say ok, leave as is and bring to group. Group has wonderful ideas for revision, except how to motivate me to actually do it. So I hang onto the comments they jotted down and their verbal feedback that I jotted down and know that at some point I will take a deep breath and pick one of the stories and hunker down. And hunker again and again and again until I end up submitting? Then if anything ever was picked up, oy, the number of revisions! And on a deadline, no less. In our group I think we all have felt comfortable bringing in really rough first versions of stories or chapters. Besides “writing is hard,” I have been known to say “please don’t be too hard, I just wrote this first draft last night.” (Writing is even harder when you are on a pregnancy-induced exile from caffeine.)

Stepping Stone

Well I need to keep this short...when inspiration strikes never neglect it.

When a pen isn't available, write it in your phone, when the phone dies, tell someone, if no one is around, repeat the inspiration. Repeat the inspiration. Repeat the inspiration.

Transform the inspiration into fuel for writing. Do it. Let the writing flow and do not stop to revise. Let it flow. No worries.

'Nuff said.

Initial Ity Bity Baby Steps

The Write 6 meet this week so we offer mini-entries on steps from idea to "ready to show the group" on our various projects.


From Robin
Original idea: 50/50 from “see a need” in the library and “learn something new on a trip.” My favorite, of course, is “have an assignment and deadline…”

Step 1: Go to coffee place, get a booth with a pad of yellow paper and a pen. Scribble very rough possibilities for a story frame. Lots of scratch outs and arrows until I can just barely see what I was thinking.



Step 2: Since I am working on quasi factual books now I research the settings, animals, weather, plants, etc, and build a glossary of fun new words. Even in real fiction I need to know if father geese actually stay near the nest during brooding.

Step 3: While I am on line play, some Chuzzle to rest my brain.

Step 4: Open 3 or 4 windows of story and research and flip around until there is a plot.

Step 5: Print out what I have a huddle over coffee again. More arrows, more notes, sometimes only the main character is salvaged.

Step 6: Go online and see if anyone else has written something like this recently because there is no reason to pursue it unless I get a really unique slant.

Step 7: Time for more brain rest with Chuzzle.

Step 8: Move paragraphs, tidy punctuation (only the really anal do it at this stage!), tweak.

Step 9: Oh, just send it! The Write 6 have been known to a plain wire hanger of a draft and encourage me to make a satin coated sachet filled story!